⚡ Is he still electric? - the Mighty vs high voltage expectations ⚡

What AI? Painted this myself this morning. Honest.

After a summer of begging for on the piss Jerry to come back, he fucked off to the kit stealers near Bedford having mistaken their stupid orange copycat effort for our vastly different, infinitely superior and highly original Tangerine and we get forgotten Josh instead - which isn't bad really, because we've got Niall who can do something a bit like what Jerry did but we've got no one who has shown any real signs of doing what Josh did - so all in all, it all works out well in the end. 

Does it though?

We've got 5 wingers all of whom are either CJ or have some doubts about their fitness, whether through injuries or simply not playing football a lot recently. We've been pretty shite* all season. Surely just buying a couple of wingers (Scott Banks coming in as well) doesn't fix everything? 

(*a technical term used by top analysts and the type of people who produce scatter graphs with different coloured dots to represent passes of different types - it means 'when a football team don't look very much like scoring and concede quite a lot of stupid goals' or to put things in proper football hipster algorithmic language (BFC (-xg/+xga = shite)) 

The answer is a (admittedly hopeful) 'maybe' 

On the yes, everything is great, we're going to win the league now side of the argument, of the things we've really lacked (since all of our creativity and forward drive went to Charlton,) someone to run with the ball is the most obvious. As a side who play quite deep and don't really utilise (or possess) a really top class hold up player, it's quite important that we have a reliable way of getting out from our own half and towards the other team's goal in another way beyond smashing it long. We were pretty good at that last year. I'm afraid I have to say 'Apter and Carey' at some point in this article, because this year we've been terrible at it. The numbers don't lie. 

- CJ Hamilton (bless him) has managed a grand total of zero successful dribbles. That's literally none. Zero. He's a fucking winger. He hasn't gone past anyone and he barely ever shoots. This isn't great. 

- Emil Hansson is averaging less than half a dribble per game and half a dribble doesn't get you many goals. He also looked like he might have accepted a recreational cigarette from someone before his last game and suffered a panic attack. The fact one of our players then mysteriously vanished into the ether is neither here nor there in regards to that comment. Obviously. 

- Tom Bloxham average 0.8 dribbles per match which is the best of the wide men, but way below the output you'd expect for a top of the table winger in a side where the wingers are key creative players. To give weight to this, of the players who've played wide left or wide right this season, Bloxham is well below halfway in the table of 'dribbles per game' - and he's the best we've had on the pitch at it.  

Put simply, we're really not very good at carrying the ball in wide areas - which, for a side playing 442 is very problematic. We need quality on the flanks desperately - because, when almost everyone plays 3 in the middle, expecting a central midfielder in tangerine to run the game is fantasy, because that central midfielder is almost certainly facing a situation where they're outnumbered and having to work very hard to combat the extra man. You cede the middle of the pitch, but you gain in other places - but if the other places aren't doing the job, then 442 is a dreadful formation - because you're fundamentally exposed by the central overload. It's why people don't play it much.  

Josh Bowler is built to run with the ball. He does this pretty much as well as anyone I've ever seen play football. He does almost nothing else - but that's not the point. If you wanted any former player, certainly in the post boycott era, to address a lack of ability to carry the ball forward by himself, then Bowler would be the number one pick out of all of them. 

His numbers over his one and a half seasons with us bear this out. He ran with the ball very well, averaging around 2.5 successful dribbles per game and quite often, at the end of his run, he had a shot on goal (about 1.9 shots per game) - At the point he left us, if memory serves correctly, he was the most successful dribbler in the entire Championship - which isn't a stat to be sniffed at. 

To put this in context - if you combined the successful dribbling of ALL of our wingers this season (including the mysterious vanishing Malcolm, then, even if they were all playing at the same time, they'd average 1.9 successful dribbles to Bowlers 2.5 in his previous spell. Basically, Bowler dribbles better than all for of them added together. In terms of shots per game, Bowler's average from prior spells also beats all four of the players above by a factor of 0.2 - again, that's one man's output versus four player's output combined. Remember as well, Bowler's stats come from a higher league. 

The other thing we really miss, is the goals from wide (shots are good, but goals are better!) - this season, we've yet to score (or assist) a goal from a wide position - last season, we managed 16 goals and 3 assists between Apter and Carey (about a third of our goals directly from wide men involvement). - Bowler scored 11 goals in 49 starts in his previous two spell with us - (as well as 4 assists) and therefore we might expect that he will also address that lack of output from the wingers.

If we look at this compared to Apter and Carey, again, we have a positive stat: 

Apter + Carey 24/25
Mins on pitch = 5213
Direct Goal involvements 19
Goal involvement every 274 mins

Bowler (all Blackpool league games) 
Mins on pitch 4573
Direct Goal involvements 15
Goal involvement every 301 mins

Simply put, Bowler's individual direct impact on games during his prior spells with us wasn't far off the combined impact of our two most creative/attacking players last season. 

This is, of course, simplistic. It's blindingly obvious to state that if the 100% in form Josh Bowler, a player who earned a Premier League move (at least in name) returns and plays the same way he did to earn that move, then we'll be a better side. I might as well say things like 'We could do with a Charlie Adam' as if it's as simple as just going to Aldi and finding the shelf marked 'generational talents' and picking one up. 

Will he be the player he was?... is the key question. It's really quite difficult to judge this one. Obviously, the fact he's lacked consistent football at a decent level for a while might allow for a slow start - but will he get to where he was over time? 

His loan spells were largely forgettable and he's never hit the statistical heights of his previous time in Tangerine. I'll write of his loan spell with us (though it is included in the above data) because Mad Mick's mental management in trying to teach him to tackle and showing him 'tough love' by making him play central midfield was sheer insanity and did no one any favours, least of all Mick. 

He struggled to get on the pitch at Luton and PNE and whilst his spell at Cardiff was more successful, he dribbling and shooting stats in Wales are nowhere near the level he'd achieved for Blackpool (all the more remarkable considering  that for X number of games he was shackled by a dogmatic Yorkshireman as referenced above) 

In fact, the evidence is quite limited - Putting aside his time with Olympiakos (simply because the stats aren't in the database I'm using) Bowler has been at QPR, Everton, Hull, Cardiff, Luton and PNE (aside from the one true footballing force in the world.) He was only with us for about a season and a half and yet, more than half (to be exact, 51.6%) of his appearances in all senior domestic football are in tangerine. Even more starkly, 80% of his career assists and 61% of his goals were scored in that relatively short spell for us.  There is no doubt at all, he was a much better player for us than he has been anywhere else. 

What made his time with us so productive? Bowler thrived in a side, that played 442 - (though I'd contend that his absolute best football came in the 433 favoured by Michael Appleton, when he was virtually unplayable for about a month and therefore, his move away became to seem inevitable.) As we've already stated, 442 isn't very en vogue in modern football - so really, Bowler hasn't had that much chance to retread his previous Blackpool role of 'out and out winger running from deep' - because generally teams don't use that like we did with him. Wide players are often higher (i.e. wide front men) or if deeper are wing backs. Bowler did play well for us as the wide forward under the sad eyed gravedigger but he's absolutely not a wing back in any world. 

It's the earlier era, under the management of Neil Critchley, that offers the most potential insight into how things might go - because Championship era Critchley and Steve Bruce aren't so far removed in terms of their approach to games. No, really, go with me... I'm trying to fabricate optimism here. It's a leap of faith this!  Following Blackpool FC always has required and will almost certainly always will require a certain suspension of disbelief... 

Critchley favoured a 442 for much of that season. Bowler played pretty  damn well for most of it. So far, so good. What has to be said though, is that Critchley's 442 showed a real attention to detail. We didn't concede silly goals, we worked incredibly hard as a unit and everyone pitched in. Whilst it was definitely 442, it was a clever set up which maximised what we had at our disposal, (I've often cited that 'Grimshaw to Madine' was statistically the best relationship between keeper and forward in the league - because it exactly shows how, whilst much maligned for his second spell, Critchley was clever and very pragmatic in getting the most out of his resources.) This attention to detail, crucially, allowed a single real indulgence, one bit of luxury, one player who wasn't subsumed into the system to the same extent everyone else was, One player who didn't have a very tightly defined role based around 'winning battles and covering a lot of ground' - This piece of most un-Crtichley-esque frivolity went by the name of 'Josh Bowler' 

The question is, therefore, can we recreate something of this set up? Is Bruce able, like Critchley was, to get 10 players well drilled enough to give the 11th the freedom? The real impact of Bowler isn't simply measurable in his direct impact (assists and goals) - it's that the freedom afforded him would open space for others, for the likes of Yates, Anderson and so on. That Championship season, we were remarkably good at taking opportunities, a very structured team, who were able to pounce on the space created in a moment and punish oppositions. We did very well, relative to what we had and Bowler was a key part in making us unpredictable, giving us a cutting edge and oppositions something they simply couldn't ignore.  He lifted us from just being a hard working side to something that was always dangerous because he could run 40 yards, very quickly, from seemingly nowhere and turn defence to attack at any moment. 

One of my post game thoughts after the drab game that was Bolton, was that we had no one on the pitch who excited me. There was no sense that out of the grinder might emerge a flash of lightning, a will'o'the wisp, a rainbow, painting the grey football with light. We were so fucking functional it hurt. Perhaps Bowler is the sprinkle of flavour that the tasteless soup requires.

Bolton was a bit different to some of our other games, in that there was a bit of 'grind' about us and perhaps that is the platform we and Bowler need. There was a lot of 'grind' about Critchley's team and maybe, just maybe, Bowler will be the point of difference that lifts that grind from being 'uninspired plodding' to 'admirable hard graft' - lose or draw and 'grind' is dull. Win and fans will celebrate it, calling it '100% effort' and other such positive compliments. 

I'd argue that most of our players are water carrier types - and water carriers are perfectly valid - in fact, some of the best players in the world fall into this class - but water carriers need someone to carry water for and on the pitch recently, there's been no one (bar Ennis if we're fair). Bowler is a thirsty player for sure. Maybe Honeyman's lung busting exploits might not be to no avail with Josh around... Most players aren't match winners - their efforts may be consistent and honest - but it is judged by the result - and often the result depends on a player who isn't them and maybe isn't as consistent or admirably grafting - but who has the magic they don't. 

Let's stretch the metaphors further (this is a Josh Bowler piece after all, and the man inspires imagery!) - for all buildings, the foundations are ugly and functional. Functionality and beauty are not diametrically opposed - they're actually, in many contexts, complimentary, maybe even necessary partners. To get back to buildings, Bowler might just be the facade that gives things grace and style. Perhaps what we saw against Bolton was indeed just the concrete footings and pilings, not the actual structure in its totality. No one has ever written a book about 'great foundations in architectural history', but all the great monuments, churches, offices of state etc would collapse without them. The roof of the Sistine Chapel would just be long forgotten dust, without the solid foundations. Maybe Josh Bowler is our Michelangelo again and the rest of them are the stonemasons and labourers that no one remembers, but whose part in history was just as important as the artist in giving him the ceiling to paint in the first place. 

It would be so, so, so Blackpool to stumble, seemingly by accident and circumstance upon something that worked.

Less lyrically, (but perhaps more relevantly,) the recent Bruce inspired swansong to Carey's Blackpool career would suggest Bruce can do something. Whilst Carey isn't as talented a dribbler as Bowler and probably overall worked a lot harder in tracking back and supporting midfield than Bowler ever has (and can head a football) the two players are not a thousand miles apart in terms of what they did and what they weren't great at. Get ball, go forward, have shot. If Bruce could see that Carey (previously used as a kind of safety first midfielder) needed licence to do this to release his potential, then Bowler should strike him as a ridiculously obvious case for freedom.

Having watched a little bit of Bowler at other clubs, it would seem to me, that in the main, they didn't really know what to do with him. They hoped they'd signed a 'regulation' winger who would do all the things you'd expect of a modern winger but as we know, he does pretty much none of those things other than dribble and shoot very well. It's a bit like the well-worn observation that ,yes, Madine couldn't run but he was better at holding it up and winning the ball than just about anyone in the country (literally) - Bowler is a player whose qualities are such that his deficits are more than made up for but you only get his qualities if you actively plan to give him the platform to show them. 

I recall a conversation with a PNE fan of my acquaintance in which I said "he'll be shit for you unless you build the whole set up around allowing him to dribble without consequence, in which case, he'll be brilliant" - they didn't build around him and he was, indeed, highly forgettable (something which is convenient as we obviously want to forget he went there too) 

The conclusion we must come to is therefore - if Bruce gives him the freedom, if Banks can play a more disciplined role on the left (ala Keshi Anderson's role, which combined hard work and flair) and if the side can be drilled to drop in and cover for Bowler as he wanders and runs into the dead ends he inevitably will do and if Danny Imray can do the work of two players at full back then actually, this could really address our shortcomings. 

Our problems have been many, but they've been compounded by an inability to 'get out' - we've really failed to put teams on the back foot for any length of time because we can't get at them - to return to the obvious point, a side playing 442 with crap wingers will really, really struggle to put any pressure on the opposition and therefore, the opposition will be emboldened to put pressure on them. Whilst, yes, we've conceded some poor goals and individual players have made mistakes, the simple fact is, if you attack more, there's less pressure on the defence and less potential for those mistakes. 

Will it work? Fuck knows. I'm a shit blogger, not a soothsayer. Does him being here give us reason for optimism? Of course it does. He was one of the best attacking talents I've ever seen in tangerine and had he got a slightly different move to somewhere that used him properly as opposed to loaning him out and freezing him out, then the chances of him turning up back here, especially in League One would have been precisely zero. There's an alternative history where Bowler goes to, say, Sheffield United and then on to say, Bournemouth and thrives. He's really fucking good at what he's good at. He was horrendously advised (on a purely footballing level) about where to take that talent next. 

It is to be hoped that his career misfortune is to turn out to be our gain. It is to be hoped for his and for our sake that he breathes in the sea air and is inspired by the salty tang of the Irish Sea,.. that a sense memory is awakened in him and he's to be found exploding from a standing start, leaving players trailing, left and a right foot stepover-ing, vaulting over lunging tackles and hitting shots with a 230 volt mains current strength electric shock charged power past prone, despairing keepers... maybe, just for once, we get to see a player take us with him as they reach their potential, instead of watching them slip away somewhere else and leave us behind stuck with the rest of them who, admirable as they are, ain't the ones who steal your heart and leave you breathless...

That would be fucking lovely. It would be something nice in a world of too much shit. 

I want this to work with every fibre of my being. I'd be prepared to even say a little prayer to the great void of nothingness in return for some fucking romance and joy and the rebirth of a player who can bring those painfully absent qualities in absolute barrow loads.

I don't really believe in anything.

I do believe in tangerine.

Therefore, if god exists, god is tangerine. 

Dear whatever higher power. Let Josh be good, not fat, slow and shit. Amen. 

Onward. 

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