because I've seen 6 red kites hung up above the road like giant feathered bin bags caught on the breeze. I know I'm in Scotland because the builders around here seem to have a bungalow fetish. In the Nith valley nestles Dumfries and in Dumfries is Palmerston Park, hame (home) of the Doon'hamers. Queen of the South are a grand old name. Cove Rangers are relative newcomers. It's kind of like us playing Stevenage.
The Portland Drive terrace is a thing of majestic wonder. It's kind of unchanged since forever. It might only have three rows of crush barriers but it's got a proper roof, with rusting metal work and a square serving hatch at the back dispensing tea, coffee and pies. It's wee compared to the great terraces of yesteryear but it's big enough to evoke a feeling that were it heaving and Queens flying high, it could be a thrilling place to be.
I wonder why Scottish towns feature so many turrets. I can see 6 from here, over the low and overgrown Terragles St terracing. Two belong to grand houses and four to the prison whose castellated design is a bigger curiosity than the football (fitba) so far.
Cove add a corner to their achievements. It's not the best set piece to have ever graced a football (fitba) pitch.
I like to attend Scottish games when opportunity arises. It has to be noted that most Scottish lower league games seem to feature a youthful drummer. The drummer is often seemingly in the process of learning how to drum and hasn't quite got to the section on 'keeping rhythm' and today is no exception. It's like listening to a record player with a dodgy motor. Faster.... Slower...
Queens square up the corner count and Ambrose wins a far post header but no one can make anything of it. Ambrose generally strolls about, slightly pigeon toed and keeps it very simple. Cove dance down the right, he trots across and puts it into the stand, like an old fella going to kick away some leaves that have fallen on his lawn.
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It has not been an all time classic so far
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The second half burts into life. Queens show first, ball through, a slip from Cove a great turn and run, they're in a shot, a good save, a follow up header blocked, the ball slashed away but then a third effort crashed towards goal and blocked, behind the line?! We play on. No goal.
Queens are playing towards us now. Reilly looks skillful but not quite quick enough. His partner is big and rural looking but is isolated.
The drummer drums on. A slow clap chant has stand on edge of joining in a little bit but the rhythm changes manically to a sort of amphetamine heart attack style samba beat and more songs about hatred of Annan are sung.
Cove send on a sub, He instantly pulls out a brilliant turn on the edge of box and a brilliant jinking run, flowing like a raindrop down glass and finishing with drive, it's well saved, and the follow up is filled by a tremendous diving header off the line.
Queens respond to Cove's patterns with a pair of promising but fruitless attacks down either flank.
Queens respond by raiding down the left, the cross is good. It's over the big lad but the little no10 is beyond him. The angle is tight, he takes a second to weigh his options and decides to shoot, curling it through a crowd and smacking the base of the post. It's not to be... Maybe one more chance from the corner that follows. It hits the arse of a Queens play and goes out of play.
Such is life.
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I've enjoyed it. I find it impossible not to love fitba (Football) at this level and below. It's just the game stripped of all the nonsense. Turn up, watch a game, go hame (home)
Queens fans troop out and bemoan their luck. One lone voice declares it fucking shite but most seem accepting of what it was. Two closely matched sides and one got the bounce of the ball.
I'll come here again and soak it all up I hope. It feels right.
Onward.
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